The Steel Hurtin’ returned to their home track of Romp ‘n’ Roll in Glenshaw, PA after placing fourth overall in the Eastern Region, their highest finish ever, to take on the Wildfires of the San Diego Derby Dolls – the only team to be ranked on both flat track and banked track – in the last bout of the season. San Diego has been making a point to visit many of the top teams in derby – Windy City, Rocky Mountain, Carolina – in a strategy that paid off for London who captured enough valuable experience in one year to surprise the league the next. The Wildfires led through the first quarter but Steel Hurtin’ came roaring back with an 85-0 run in the second half to win the hard-hitting, furiously-paced battle, 223-101. In the first bout of the night, the Rubber City Roller Girls made the trip in from Akron, Ohio to take on the B-Unit, hoping for better returns than last year’s defeat in the Blitzburgh Bombers’ inaugural bout. In a defense-dominated, slow and physical bout, Rubber City held a lead up until two minutes to go in the first half and then B-Unit took control to an eventual 97-67 victory.

The opening match set a tone early of slow packs keeping the jammers under wraps. Standout performances by Rubber City’s Scum Dog, Red Bruzher, Imma Be Tolley, and Jackie O’Sassin and B-Unit’s Tower O’Terror, Wham Bam Pam, MILFshake, and the debuting Auntie Establishment kept the scoring low through the first 9 minutes, after which B-Unit led 12-7 thanks to a grand-slam from McShovin. Then, Akron’s Punisher Pixie, who lived up to her name with big hits despite her small stature, forced a track cut on McShovin. Jackie O’Sassin took advantage of the powerjam, following great clearing blocks by Mae B. Hazardous to deke through the shorthanded B-Unit pack for 18 points and a sudden 25-12 lead for Rubber City. Three jams later, McShovin found lead jammer snatched away at the last second by a block from Jackie O’Sassin who then drew a back block sending the B-Unit jammer to the box again as Eighty SixHer added 9 points increasing the lead at the midpoint of the half to 36-15.

Stella Bruise continued the powerjam, shrugging off a hit from MILFshake to give Rubber City its biggest lead of the night at 41-15. B-Unit would turn things around for the remainder of the half, however, only allowing 3 more points before the break, switching from a back wall defense to a front wall. After London Blitz got Steel City 4 points closer, sMelU took to the jam line for her Pittsburgh debut. On turn two, she worked a great inside tightrope for lead as Cruisin’ B. Anthony took out Stella Bruise who could never escape a pack led by Tower O’Terror and Wham Bam Pam. sMelU worked past the tough positional defense of Saucy Minxx and relentless hitting of Punisher Pixie to get 4 more. It was another Steel City debut skater, Public Emily, whose fast moves netted a 10-3 jam to bring B-Unit within 11 points with 6 minutes to go. With the score at 44-36, Ina Gadda Da Beatcha and Busty Brawler put good hits on the Akron captain, DeadEye HuntHer, eventually sending the jammer to the box and setting up McShovin for a powerjam. But great defense from Punisher Pixie and Mae B. Hazardous never allowed the speedy B-Unit jammer to escape the pack. With DeadEye HuntHer still in the box to begin the next jam, the veteran Cruisin’ B. Anthony toed the line, seemingly always in place to grab a lead change this season. Just as expected, the former Ithaca SufferJet came through for 12 points as MILFshake and Wham Bam Pam put good work on DeadEye HuntHer’s return, sending her back to the sin bin with a forced track cut. With just a minute remaining, London Blitz dodged Punisher Pixie and a light pack for a grand-slam and a halftime score of 53-44 in favor of B-Unit.

After the break, defense from both teams again rose to the forefront. DeadEye HuntHer and Auntie Establishment took turns taking out opposing jammers while the pairs of Mae B. Hazardous and Punisher Pixie for Akron and Wham Bam Pam and Busty Brawler for Pittsburgh held great positioning in tight packs and after almost 13 minutes the score had only increased to 60-44, which, including the end of the first half, meant a 20-minute shutout run for B-Unit. Ina Gadda Da Beatcha then mercilessly hip checked Stella Bruise to the outside and booty blocked her right in the middle of the track while McShovin unleashed 14 points which seemed like 114 in such a low scoring bout and the B-Unit lead was up to 76-44. Scum Dog’s quick moves through the pack got Rubber City back in the scoring but with just a quarter remaining, B-Unit led 77-46.

With Jackie O’Sassin cooling her wheels in the penalty box for a track cut, London Blitz sought to run up some points but great defense by Valiant Vixen kept the damage to only 5 points on the powerjam. Three jams later, Cruisin’ B. Anthony took a pair of 4-0 jams: the first, pinballing and sliding through a full pack; the second, defeating a 3-1 blocker disadvantage by beating Stella Bruise in a sprint through a no-pack start. With 7 minutes remaining, down 92-48, Rubber City began to mount a comeback. With 10 skaters finally on the track, Jackie O’Sassin won a 4-2 and Stella Bruise followed with a 4-0 as a great block by DeadEye HuntHer recycled McShovin way to the back. In the final jam, down by 39, Punisher Pixie jammed for the first time and used her great speed for 9 points as Mae B. Hazardous continually forced Public Emily to the outside. But the strategy change came too late and B-Unit closed out their season with a 97-67 victory over the much-improved Akronites.

The San Diego Derby Dolls psyched themselves up for a big time upset by slapping each other across the face and then building up a massive “We don’t need no water, let the Wildfires burn!” chant. And indeed, it looked like this would be their night in the early going. After getting help from opposing jammer Kiki Diazz, Steel Hurtin’s Mean Burrito overcame a star sock malfunction and a big knockdown to take a 2-1 lead after one jam. But the Wildfires’ Kung Pow Tina’s fast moves on the inside combined with a truck malfunction for ‘snot rocket science to take the lead for San Diego at 4-2 which could have been much worse as Kung Pow Tina had not detected that ‘snot rocket science was going one-legged boarder-style through the clear part of the track. O.B. Noxious put big hits on The Crippler and eventually drew a back block to set up the first powerjam of the night for the Wildfires. Despite a big hit from Athena, recycling her far to the back, Heidi Evidence was able to score 9 against a light Steel Hurtin’ pack and open up San Diego’s lead to 13-3. O.B. Noxious then donned the star to score 8 more as ‘snot rocket science found herself with more skate trouble. But the Steel Hurtin’s experience showed as captain and pivot Ally McKill took the star pass from the one-legged jammer and equaled the 8 points as J-Bomb kept O.B. Noxious from any further scoring. The Crippler stretched the pack, passing Derby Dolls blockers one by one as damage dahl cleared her for a 4-0 scoring pass. Then Madame Abagael led a goat pen on Punk N. Da’Trunk to free Mean Burrito for lead jam while Death Cake for Cutie cleared the center for a 4-0 jam and the gap was closed to 22-19 with about 16 minutes to go in the half.

Steel Hurtin’ got their first powerjam as damage dahl forced O.B. Noxious to cut the track. Kung Pow Tina and Isabelle Ringer killed the penalty well, however, forcing The Crippler to the inside and long trips to the back of the pack. Still, the svelte skater pressed into jammer duty was able to take the lead for Steel Hurtin’ at 23-22. Double Destroyer then continued the good offensive blocking for Pittsburgh, freeing ‘snot rocket science for another 4-0. A last second block by San Diego co-captain Slamurai kept Mean Burrito from lead jammer and then drew a back block setting Kiki Diazz up for a powerjam and a chance for the Wildfires to get the lead back. After four points, however, Kiki Diazz went to the box for her own back block and Mean Burrito shot out for the first double-digit jam of the night and a 37-26 lead. Kung Pow Tina got lead jam and a grand-slam back for the Wildfires as a great back wall of Isabelle Ringer, Jean Slay, Some Brero, and Lemon Drop held ‘snot rocket science in check. But the jam timbre changed quickly as Bonecrusher forced a cut from Kung Pow Tina and ‘snot rocket science slid through the wall, now reformed at the pack’s front, with a signature half-turn backward-skating maneuver drawing roars from the crowd and netting 13 points on the powerjam. Penalties continued to keep the pack light with 6 minutes to go. Bonecrusher and Athena’s big hits on Heidi Evidence on the outside were equaled by O.B. Noxious’s hits on The Crippler on the inside, eventually forcing a track cut. The jam ended 8-8 with San Diego still with a couple seconds remaining in the powerjam. Kiki Diazz took lead and got 3 more before The Crippler returned, only to be taken out in a frightening low leg whip from Slamurai which left the Steel Hurtin’ veteran down in obvious pain. After a long and tense time-out, The Crippler left the field of play smiling and shin-iced, with the lead for Steel Hurtin’ at 62-42 with 3 minutes remaining. A fired-up ‘snot rocket science took on a starting no-pack mere inches in front of the jam line, rolling around a block by Punk N. Da’Trunk with assistance from Athena to stay upright and in bounds, again dodging through the pack backwards for a triple grand-slam the hard way. San Diego stayed tough through the final jam of the half, however, as Jean Slay, O.B. Noxious, and Some Brero waterfalled Mean Burrito for several passes as Kung Pow Tina got 5 back to end the half with a close 77-47 lead for Steel Hurtin’.

The second half continued the close battle at first. Mean Burrito bolted to daylight for 9 points as Bonecrusher gave Kung Pow Tina the business all along the outside. ‘snot rocket science followed, forcing Kiki Diazz to “eat the baby” after getting lead. Good defense by Redrum held ‘snot rocket science to just one scoring pass, however and the lead was 86-47. Mean Burrito then tried to play some jammer-on-jammer defense on Kung Pow Tina but the plan backfired as the San Diego jammer escaped through for 14 points as Isabelle Ringer dogged Mean Burrito and kept her in the pack for the full two minutes. ‘snot rocket science then racked up another 13, dodging for lead jammer, as Kiki Diazz got 4 of her own, surprisingly winning a David-Goliath collision against Athena. The Crippler returned to a big hand but also to big recycling blocks by Kiki Diazz and Isabelle Ringer as O.B. Noxious scored 9 before having to head to the box. With the pack lightened as more and more Wildfires burned in the hole, The Crippler got the 9 back. Mean Burrito then hopped and dodged through her own powerjam for 15 points, the final grand-slam coming after an amazing full-stop-to-a-tiptoe move to avoid a stopped San Diego back wall itching to draw a penalty. In the next jam, as ‘snot rocket science went to the box, Kiki Diazz was able to score a triple grand-slam herself as Isabelle Ringer and Some Brero goated damage dahl and with 15 minutes to go, the game was still in question as Steel Hurtin’ led 127-89.

The last quarter would be another story, however, as the Steel Hurtin’ coaches BArf and Buttmouth made great adjustments and penalties caught on like dry brush for the Wildfires. Kiki Diazz went to the box at the end of a 4-0 win for ‘snot rocket science and in an inspiring moment, Cheeseburger took to the jam line alone, having fought her way all season against breast cancer. Cheeseburger put on great moves, skating untouched to the outside, drawing whiffs from Slamurai and Heidi Evidence, and scoring 16 huge points. Mean Burrito’s mega-hyper, no-quit feet, like a football running back pushing through a goal line stand, got herself lead jam as Kiki Diazz returned only to be sent right back. Athena and Double Destroyer ran a trap in the back and Mean Burrito cashed in 22 points. Madame Abagael then drew a back block from Heidi Evidence and ‘snot rocket science slipped and spun through the stopped pack for another 20-point powerjam. Double Destroyer then played the same card against Isabelle Ringer, who, after watching Mean Burrito score another 18, returned only to immediately be sent back at the end of the jam for another back block against Athena. The Crippler then continued the never ending powerjam, riding a clearing block from Death Cake for Cutie (like Bastian riding Falkor? too deep a reference?) until a good hit from Kiki Diazz recycled her to the back of the pack. Bonecrusher took out a pair of San Diego blockers on The Crippler’s 5-0 scoring pass but play then stopped for an injured Punk N. Da’Trunk who appeared to be ok after a brief breather. When play continued, the visibly frustrated Isabelle Ringer shot out of the box and grabbed lead with some slick moves to end an incredible 85-0 Steel Hurtin’ run with a 5-4 jam. The final two minutes stayed even with J-Bomb answering a 1-second remaining timeout by San Diego by immediately calling off the final jam after getting lead. While the 223-101 final score does not accurately reflect how close 75% of the bout was, it was a satisfyingly strong victory to end the most successful season to date for the continually improving Steel Hurtin’.

Team Affiliation: Steel Hurtin’

Role: Team Mascot

How She Came to Join Us: A small town gal from the woods of West Virginia who has quickly become streetwise in the ways of the big city. She didn’t know much about roller derby before meeting Bonecrusher, LaDiabla, and Ally McKill on their way to Regionals in 2008, but what she lacked in knowledge, she made up for in attitude and enthusiasm. Soon she was covering herself in gold glitter (and not much else) and shaking her sassy tail at every Steel Hurtin bout.

Likes: Lady Gaga, Random Dudes, and Roller Derby.

Dislikes: Wearing Clothes.

Team Affiliation: Steel Hurtin’

Role: Coach

Athletic Background: None

Origin of Skater Name: I just thought it would be a funny name

Day Job: I work at a screen printing supplier.

Favorite Foods: I don’t really like to eat. I prefer to ingest quality calories that can be consumed in a hurry.

Hobbies: Skateboarding, fishing, building skate spots, playing music, rolling dice, foosball, pool, bowling, boxing, shooting.

Special Talents: I can tie your tongue in a knot with a cherry stem.

Favorite Quote: “you’re dumb!”

Weird Quirks: None, I’m normal.

Name:  ‘snot rocket science


Team Affiliation: Steel Hurtin’ – Co-Captain 2011

Position(s): Jammer, Blocker and Pivot

Committee Involvement: Training & Skills and Finance/Fundraising/Sponsorship (Member)

Awards Received/Nominated for: Won MVP Jammer for the Steel Hurtin’ 2010 and Nominated for Most Inspirational 2010.

Athletic Background: Skating since 6 years old, competitive roller figure skater from ages 9-14. Multiple competition medals from around my region in Virginia. I placed sixth at Nationals in 1994. I have won all the “races” at sessions.  I have played soccer since age 6.  I played soccer on recreation, travel and school teams throughout high school. Made and started on the Varsity team in 8th grade. Also, I played tennis and volleyball in high school.

Name: Cheeseburger

Team Affiliation: Steel Hurtin’

Position(s): Jammer and Blocker

Committee Involvement: Merchandise (Head)

Awards Received/Nominated for: Team MVP Slumber Party Slashers 2007, Nominated for Miss SCDD 2010, and Won Most Inspirational 2010

Tidbit: Cheeseburger took some time off in 2010 and 2011 to fight breast cancer and has come back to the SCDD as healthy and strong as ever!

Baltimore, MD – With a trip to Denver for the WFTDA National Championship on the line, the fourth-seeded Steel City Derby Demons Steel Hurtin’ took on the third-seeded Charm City Roller Girls All Stars, who, along with the D.C. Rollergirls hosted a well-run and entertaining East Region Playoffs at the Du Burns Arena. The two similarly-styled teams of black and yellow warmed up with some good-natured teasing by Baltimore, wearing the jerseys of the Ravens football squad who’d trounced the Pittsburgh Steelers a week earlier. Hard-hitting would be the name of the game on another football Sunday as Charm’s pack- and lead-control built up a first-half 88-point lead that could not be caught despite a much closer second half. Charm is going to Nationals with the 189-94 victory.

The first half was dominated at the jam line by Charm City who captured all but 2 lead jams. Things started inauspiciously for Steel City as ‘snot rocket science was called for a track cut. Athena’s shove of teammate Ally McKill knocked Charm’s I.M. Pain out of bounds and kept her from running the score too high on the powerjam. But as ‘snot rocket science returned, she was almost immediately sent back for a back block and after one jam it was 13-0 Charm. After Joy Collision’s chest block blew up the Bonecrusher-anchored Pittsburgh front wall, Crowella De Vil’s dexterous feet scampered through a penalty-troubled Steel Hurtin’ pack for 23 more points. ‘snot rocket science did get Steel Hurtin’ on the board however with 2 late points. I.M.Pain was able to extend the lead by another 9 but the Charm squad’s hard hitting on Hurricane Heather kept her scoreless but started to fill the penalty box. In the ensuing jam, Joy Collision was able to knock Mean Burrito out to prevent her from getting lead jam. “C.C.” Bang! Bang! was not awarded it either and Mean Burrito was able to win the 13-7 two-minute jam. Two jams later, Mean Burrito shot through the pack as I.M. Pain called it, winning a surprising 4-2 jam to bring the score to 56-19. Then Joy Collision showed why she’s one of the best blockers in Derby, constantly recycling Hurricane Heather back to the pack as Crowella De Vil leaped through the pack for 18 points the hard way. With 15 minutes in the books, Charm led 75-19.

The Shocker captured the first lead jam for Steel City as Athena drew the blockers’ attention. Then, Crowella De Vil was called for a track cut to give Steel Hurtin’ the opportunity they’d wanted. Unfortunately, the Shocker could only score 7 on the ensuing powerjam before she was sent to the box herself. Starting out alone, Just Carol had a hard time as La Diabla*, ‘snot rocket science, and Ally McKill killed the penalty. But Just Carol was able to effectively still play a powerjam for 20 points as Dolly Rocket’s superior blocking at the back of the pack neutralized the Shocker on her return and then sent her again to the box by drawing a back block. Joy Collision and Holden Grudges stood out on defense keeping Steel City off the scoreboard as the lead increased incrementally. With seven minutes remaining in the half, grabbing only the second lead jam for Pittsburgh, ‘snot rocket science battled Lady Quebeaum at the back of the pack and Holly Gohardly at the front and managed to get through three times to I.M. Pain’s two to win a 14-8 jam. Just Carol answered, slenderly slipping through pairs of blockers to score 9 as Charm’s defense came up with their another of their 14 first-half jam shutouts. With two minutes to go, Crowella De Vil beat the Crippler around the outside while Holly Gohardly held the Shocker on the inside for another 4 for Charm. Just Carol had time to get her own 4-0 by shrugging off blows from Athena and ‘snot rocket science and the first half ended with a commanding 129-41 lead.

Mean Burrito seemed to be on her way to a lead jam to begin the second half but a last-second Holden Grudges block sent her sprawling to the center of the track as I.M. Pain successfully added on another 13. Steel City then turned it about as Crowella De Vil seemingly had a shot at lead but a last-second wall formed by the Crippler and Friction VixXxen kept her in the pack. Crowella De Vil was then called to the box and Hurricane Heather was able to finally knock out a good jam for 9 points. ‘snot rocket science continued the carried-over powerjam for 9 more until Joy Collision’s big hit snuffed that candle. The Shocker completed the 22-0 Steel Hurtin’ run, shooting through the diminishing Charm City pack as Athena recycled Just Carol to the back of the pack.

The black back wall of Baltimore then got momentum back for Charm. Holly Gohardly, Rosie the Rioter, and Loretta Scars were too much for Hurricane Heather; then Dolly Rocket, Thorough Bled, and Reckless N’Dangerment proved to be the same for ‘snot rocket science. Charm seemed content to lose blockers to the box in exchange for preventing points and lead jams and Steel City was not able to capitalize on the pack advantages until ‘snot rocket science scored a 4-0 against a 2-1 pack. Then Mean Burrito won the race through a no-pack to score 9 as Crowella De Vil seemingly went to the box, only to be sprung immediately afterward to score 5 causing a bit of confusion. Holly Gohardly worked over the Shocker but too many Charm blockers went to the box. The Shocker scored 4 and Hurricane Heather got 4 herself against a starting pack consisting solely of Dolly Rocket. With one quarter remaining, Charm City held a 154-84 lead.

For the remainder of the bout, Charm was able to capture lead most of the time to seal the victory, content to keep the scoring low or even scoreless as time ticked away. In a sole exception, Just Carol slipped through for 15 while Holly Gohardly and Holden Grudges took turns keeping the Shocker in the pack, showcasing a wide assortment of blocking styles. With only four-and-a-half minutes left, Athena and Friction VixXxen kept Crowella De Vil trapped on the inside and ‘snot rocket science was able to break the shutout run with her own 4-0. Holden Grudges then donned the star herself, scoring 5 as Joy Collision worked over Mean Burrito. The Shocker finally got a little daylight to grab lead jammer but Rosie the Rioter spoiled her scoring pass and I.M. Pain equaled her, 4-4 to bring the final score to 189-94. Charm City goes on to represent the Eastern Region at Nationals and Steel City goes home with their highest Playoff finish, at fourth place.

Congratulations to the Steel Hurtin’ for their most successful season ever!

Baltimore, MD – Having already earned their best standing at Eastern Regionals, the Steel City Steel Hurtin’ drew the unenviable position of taking on arguably the top team in all of flat-track roller derby, the Gotham Girls Roller Derby All-Stars. Gotham came in to skate their first official bout of the tournament, having won their scheduled first bout against Dutchland via forfeit.In the first half, Gotham predictably controlled the pack but did not absolutely dominate the feisty Pittsburgh squad who battled for the entire 30 minutes to finish only down by 115. In the second half, however, Gotham turned it up a notch, shutting out Steel City for 24 minutes straight and running up 11 double-digit jams, 6 of which with 25 or more points, adding up to a final of 404-30.

Bonnie Thunders lined up for Gotham against her fellow Team USA skater ‘snot rocket science, beating her for a quick 3 points. Papierschnitt, Brigitte Barhot, Fisti Cuffs, and Wild Cherri then began an all-bout precedent of a fairly impregnable NY back wall, keeping Mean Burrito in place while Suzy Hotrod motored to another 9. Bonnie Thunders then cranked out 18 as Gotham displayed even more weaponry, great one-on-one blocking, with Donna Matrix putting the clamps on Hurricane Heather. With the score 30-0, Steel Hurtin’s Ally McKill drew a back block on Sexy Slaydie, and while her teammates Cheeseburger, J-Bomb, and Double Destroyer constructed a goat pen, the Crippler was able to score 2 off the powerjam. The Shocker then toed the line for Pittsburgh but great bridge-work by the Gotham pack killed off the remainder of the penalty with no damage done and Sexy Slaydie returned to score a grand slam. Showing no weak links on the team, Kandy Kakes then controlled ‘snot rocket science one-on-one to win one jam for Gotham and Wild Cherri’s very quick moves through a melee won the next. Sexy Slaydie then powered through for lead jammer as Hurricane Heather was sent to the box. Steel City showed they could play some one-on-one as well, as La Diabla* worked the much larger Sexy Slaydie back and forth until she drew her own back block. The Gotham defense proved too strong for Hurricane Heather or the Crippler to score any more points and with 15 minutes to go, Gotham led 58-2.

Another big hit from Sexy Slaydie kept the Shocker from lead jammer but she was able to recover as Bonnie Thunders went to the box, scoring 6 points on the powerjam. Wild Cherri then got 6 back for Gotham fighting through the inside as Papierschnitt and Hyper Lynx continued to make life miserable for Hurricane Heather. ‘snot rocket science tried to skate to daylight from the initial scrum of the next jam but a quickly-adjusting Sweet Sherry Pie caught her and forced her back into the pack and the score was 69-8, Gotham. A great wall by Donna Matrix and Papierschnitt was equaled by waterfalling blocks by J-Bomb and Madame Abagael and no jammer escaped the pack for a minute. Finally, B.Zerk and Mean Burrito shot through side by side, neither declared lead, and when penalties thinned the pack, Mean Burrito had won that matchup, 6-4. Two jams later, however, B.Zerk struck for a huge 29 points, skating freely through a 4-2 pack advantage as Bonnie Thunders, Hela Skelter, and Wild Cherri kept Hurricane Heather at a standstill. Mean Burrito was able to capture the first lead jam for Steel City without benefit of a powerjam but could not escape Sweet Sherry Pie until a clearing block from Bonecrusher. La Diabla* did yeoman’s work on Suzy Hotrod but the All-Star was still able to outscore Mean Burrito, 7-4. With the score 113-18, Ally McKill drew another back block, this time from Wild Cherri and despite operating through a short-handed pack, the Shocker was able to fight past Sexy Slaydie for a grand slam. With only 30 seconds to go in the half, Steel City had hung to within 90 points but Bonnie Thunders quickly ended that dream, swiftly flying around the track for 25 points with Hurricane Heather in the box. Steel City got back some momentum right as the jam ended as the Crippler drew a back block from Bonnie Thunders as the whistle ended the 138-23 half.

Whatever momentum Pittsburgh sought to continue was quashed as Sexy Slaydie knocked ‘snot rocket science around to kill the penalty. Bonnie Thunders launched out of the penalty box for lead jam and 28 points as Sexy Slaydie rumbled her personal locomotive through the Pittsburgh blockers as well, unfortunately for Double Destroyer. Suzy Hotrod’s amazing acceleration generated another 28 for Gotham as Papierschnitt and Wild Cherri continued to dominate the back of the pack where Hurricane Heather was only able to score at the end of the two minutes. The lead had opened to 194-27 in only 5 minutes. Sexy Slaydie demonstrated great agility in addition to power, hammering 14 points home with an apex jump as Fisti Cuffs drove the Shocker out of bounds again and again, beginning a 24-minute shutout of Pittsburgh. Donna Matrix, Papierschnitt, Wild Cherri, and OMG WTF continued to dominate the bustling and stopped packs, drawing a penalty from a jamming Cheeseburger. Suzy Hotrod capitalized for 25 followed by 30 from Wild Cherri as they flew past the standstill packs. With 15 minutes to go, Gotham had extended the lead to 269-27.

The domination continued as B.Zerk struck for 30 of her own, collapsing a wall in front of her as Suzy Hotrod, FistiCuffs, and Sexy Slaydie took turns playing one-on-one against Hurricane Heather, who as soon as she escaped one, found the other two in front of her again. With 10 minutes to go, a frustrated Steel City began to pile up penalties. Wild Cherri beat ‘snot rocket science at the front of the pack through multiple passes for 15 points. Suzy Hotrod followed with 30 as Fisti Cuffs and Sweet Sherry Pie controlled the front, drawing a back block from the Shocker. ‘snot rocket science was then called for a pair of majors over the next two jams as B.Zerk and Wild Cherri added on another 15 and 21, respectively. In the final jam, the Shocker was able to wrest the first lead jam in the second half for Steel City but found herself shut down by Hyper Lynx and Bonnie Thunders while B.Zerk rattled off 18. Unwilling to end the game without scoring, the Shocker eventually fought through to get 3. Steel City’s answer to Gotham’s domination came up a file not found with the final score 404-30. Gotham goes on to the finals on Sunday against the winner of 2E Philly and 3E Charm while Steel City will take on the loser of that bout.

Being the No. 1 seed in the east and a former world champion, the Gotham Girls are a formidable opponent, no matter who they play.

We are all proud of the Hurtin’, especially the players who are new to the team this year, including Death Cake for Cutie, Dakota Slamming, and Mean Burrito.  This game also saw the triumphant return to game play from SCDD OG Cheeseburger.

Congrats girls!

Tomorrow, the Hurtin’ will be vying for 3rd place with either Philly or Charm city, depending on how the rest of the day susses out.  If they do beat the winner of the Philly/Charm game, the Hurtin’ will be heading to Championships.

Baltimore, MD – The Steel City Steel Hurtin’ and Montreal New Skids on the Block hooked up in a very evenly-matched contest, which each team well aware that any shot at Nationals hinged on the results of this bout. Montreal fought back from an early deficit to take the lead just after the half but never got that one big powerjam which had been Steel City’s weakness and Pittsburgh’s controlled game slowly recaptured and stretched the lead until the end with the final score of Steel City (4) 134, Montreal (5) 88.

The first half almost exclusively consisted of one-pass jams, low scores, and a constant array of jammer-line starting packs. Steel City’s star jammers ‘snot rocket science and Hurricane Heather led off with a quick one-two punch to give Pittsburgh the early 7-0 lead. An apex jump by Mange Moi El Cul and a sweet move by Iron Wench around Bonecrusher got 6 unanswered points back for the New Skids over the next two jams. The Steel Hurtin’ defense shut down Montreal over the next 5 jams highlighted by damage dahl’s steady work on Georgia W. Tush and Ally McKill’s big hits on Mange Moi El Cul and the score was 16-6, Steel City. The reliable Iron Wench captured lead jam for Montreal, as she did in 14 of 16 jams, and shot through for 4 points. Before she could call it off, she took a big hit from Ally McKill and her skate hit Ally McKill in the helmet, giving Steel City the first powerjam opportunity to begin the next jam with 17 minutes to go in the half.

The defense of Montreal stepped up however, led by Jess Bandit, Rae Volver, and Chasing Amy and held Mean Burrito to only 6 points over the penalty. The Shocker added another 4 for Pittsburgh as Friction VixXxen kept Ti-Loup off the scoreboard. Iron Wench answered with a 4-0 as Lil’ Mama relentlessly battered ‘snot rocket science. Athena then dominated Mange Moi El Cul at the back of the pack giving Mean Burrito time to take several punishing trips through the pack to extend the Steel Hurtin’ lead to 25 with 10 minutes to go. At that point, the New Skids on the Block really turned it on as penalties lightened the pack. Lil’ Mama and Jess Bandit led a defense that held Pittsburgh to only 9 more points in the half while Iron Wench’s bursts of speed, Georgia W. Tush’s ability to withstand multiple hits, and Ti-Loup’s agility racked up 27 to close the half at 49-41 Steel City.

Montreal maintained momentum as the second half whistle blew. Lil’ Mama kept up her big hits on Mean Burrito and Iron Wench shot through the short pack for a huge 12 points without benefit of a powerjam. Montreal had the lead 53-49 having erased a 23-point deficit. A big block by Athena freed Hurricane Heather to get 3 points closer and then The Shocker won a tough matchup against Ti-Loup to tie the game. Mean Burrito fought past Cheese Grater to win a rare lead jam against Iron Wench and recaptured the lead for Steel City at 57-56. Then, despite more penalty trouble for Steel Hurtin’ blockers, Hurricane Heather rattled off 10 points to Georgia W. Tush’s 4 as Pittsburgh’s bench allowed her to skate out the jam. Pittsburgh led 67-60 with 22 minutes to go.

Smack Daddy rode ‘snot rocket science out of bounds clearing Ti-Loup for lead jammer, but as they would do multiple times in the half, Athena’s rear guard and ‘snot rocket science’s closing speed forced Montreal to call off without scoring. After Iron Wench got 4 back for Montreal, Georgia W. Tush looked to keep up the high-energy, deflecting off ‘snot rocket science for lead jammer and then dodging past Athena on her first scoring pass. But then Athena drew a major back block call on the Montreal jammer and The Shocker scored 10 for Steel City, the last points just as the jam clock ended as ‘snot rocket science broke up the two-wall in front. Mean Burrito took the line still in a powerjam situation but a skate malfunction sent her to the center of the track as time ticked away and the opportunity seemed to be wasted with only 3 points for Pittsburgh. With a quarter to go, it was 80-68 Steel Hurtin’.

Two jams later, a great block by Bone Machine took out both Mean Burrito and Friction VixXxen and Iron Wench’s 4 brought the deficit to 10. The Shocker then was first out of the pack but was not declared lead. With only Bonecrusher to pass, Georgia W. Tush seemed ready to capture control but Bonecrusher’s positional defense forced a back block. In the ensuing powerjam, The Shocker opened the lead up by 10 more points with less than 10 minutes to go. Montreal’s chances were foiled, however, over the final 6 jams as Iron Wench’s three lead jams were caught three times by ‘snot rocket science, resulting in two scoreless jams and a 3-1 Steel City win. Meanwhile, Hurricane Heather utilized smart clock management, skating out her jams for 14 and 17 points while Georgia W. Tush could only manage 3 and 8 against Steel Hurtin’ blockers Madame Abagael and Athena. ‘snot rocket science skated out the final jam, the bout ending with Steel City’s largest lead of the game: 134-88, as the Pittsburgh supporters began an exuberant cheer of “Yinz! Yinz! Yinz! Yinz!.”

The game was very close, but the Hurtin’ carved out a 20 to 30 point lead in the first half.  Montreal chipped away and was able to close the gap to bring the score to a tie a little after half time.  However, the Hurtin’ was having none of that and they gained a sizable lead again.  At the end of the game, the Hurtin’ had prevailed with an amazing score of 134 – 88.

This is a much bigger point gap than the first time the Hurtin’ faced Montreal in April, proving again that the Hurtin’ deserved their 4th place seed over Montreal’s fifth.

The Hurtin’ will next face #1 seed the goliath Gotham Girls tomorrow Saturday September 17th at 2:00 pm.

Congrats Hurtin!!  Keep it up!